This is a daily occurrence over here. I get home from work, mentally and physically exhausted.....and usually overwhelmed from doing things with symptoms for hours. I lay down, try to relax and unwind....but then a confusion happens,, after a while, like you describe....am I avoiding? Sometimes I make myself get up, do laundry, do dishes, run the vacuum. Or I go visit my mom, 5 min away. I have to be honest, I'm tired MOST of the time, so often it's I'm tired and avoiding.....or just tired....But then some days I'm really terribly exhausted....those days I usually kinda pass out on the couch.......I have this in the morning too! If I can sleep in I sometimes wake up early and do what I'm doing now. I can tell I truly am still tired and could definitely sleep more....but then my anxiety brain kicks in....and things get awkward.....then I wonder should I just get up to do stuff since my amygdala is yapping? Or should I make myself sleep more since I'm still tired....😆😆😆🥴🥴🤷🤷🤷🤷😊
Gosh I so relate to this Cara, I was going to make that very point myself after listening to this episode. I’m quite active (by nature of my job) but am always/often TIRED. Despite my ruminating mind (which usually kicks heavy in in the mornings) I’ve never struggled with being able to get to sleep. I could sleep anywhere, anytime! I’ve recently started to wonder if it’s the anxiety which constantly make me feel exhausted, as I’ve had the anxiety all my life so perhaps the two go hand in hand. Sometimes on stressful days when I’ve had to deal with a lot of anxiety trigger situations at work (I have social anxiety disorder) I can come home completely knackered & collapse on the couch, so even if we’re out there facing our fears & doing all the incremental exposures etc, I find it still impacts the subconscious & our core tiredness levels. Then you start wondering hmm… is my body really actually physically tired or is it all linked to my mental state caused by constant, incessant anxiety. It can be a real merry-go-round situation. I also like your term ‘amygdala yapping’… this is brilliant, & so accurate! I think Drew’s point around if we’re unsure (ie.pondering if we’re lying on the couch due to actual physical tiredness, or merely avoidance) to go over a short list of possible things to do, do one or two of these & see how they go, I think this will really help me. Anyhow going to get myself up and out now as I’ve given myself enough extra sleep this morn (it’s the weekend lol)… but I have things to do which are not going to do themselves😆
Yep, I have today off...instead of sleeping in ridiculously late or laying in bed with my amygdala yapping I just got up when I woke up. Making breakfast, fed the cats, wiped the counter...Guess what? Tired....upon waking...the usual...Pouted a little....I can do laundry, work out, set up Xmas tree....clean the porch off, or clean the mess I just discovered under the kitchen sink, I think I saw mouse poo(😳😬). We will see how long the bit of energy I have lasts.
Great discussion Drew. This was something I struggled with early on in my recovery years ago. Over time you learn that accomplishing things feels really good and you start to crave it. Once in a while you might actually find yourself interested in what you are doing instead of resting and ruminating, and that’s when the magic happens. That interest can build and propel you off the couch. I could always tell the difference between tired and anxious by gaging my rumination level. Laying around stuck in your head and scanning how you feel isn’t very restful. Doing some physical yard work that keeps you in the moment, even just in short bursts, is much more restful for the mind. Sorry for the ramble. Thanks for all you do!
Well articulated, you’ve hit the nail on the head with the rumination point and being a gauge, it’s so much more restful & quietening for the mind doing something physical or interesting… it’s just the effort it can sometimes take to actually start doing the thing, which can sometimes be the issue for me lol. A bit like going to gym… hard to push oneself out the door into the cold, but once I’m in the class or have completed my run (or whatever activity I did at the gym) boy do I feel glad I went and did it😁
So true that the initial effort is the challenge. You never regret after completing the activity, but the lead up can be quite excruciating. Sure wish the fight or flight system was easier to retrain through a couple of exposures, but it can sure be a long process. What’s on the other side is certainly worth the effort.
Boy I relate to this. In my case, it’s “Am I sick or afraid?” This week I actually called out from work— I haven’t done that in years— because of a bad cold. But then I spent some time thinking “But am I really sick enough to stay home? I think I’m just anxious. Oh no, is this avoidance?” (Despite having a cough, runny nose, and fever.) It was quite silly!
This is a daily occurrence over here. I get home from work, mentally and physically exhausted.....and usually overwhelmed from doing things with symptoms for hours. I lay down, try to relax and unwind....but then a confusion happens,, after a while, like you describe....am I avoiding? Sometimes I make myself get up, do laundry, do dishes, run the vacuum. Or I go visit my mom, 5 min away. I have to be honest, I'm tired MOST of the time, so often it's I'm tired and avoiding.....or just tired....But then some days I'm really terribly exhausted....those days I usually kinda pass out on the couch.......I have this in the morning too! If I can sleep in I sometimes wake up early and do what I'm doing now. I can tell I truly am still tired and could definitely sleep more....but then my anxiety brain kicks in....and things get awkward.....then I wonder should I just get up to do stuff since my amygdala is yapping? Or should I make myself sleep more since I'm still tired....😆😆😆🥴🥴🤷🤷🤷🤷😊
Gosh I so relate to this Cara, I was going to make that very point myself after listening to this episode. I’m quite active (by nature of my job) but am always/often TIRED. Despite my ruminating mind (which usually kicks heavy in in the mornings) I’ve never struggled with being able to get to sleep. I could sleep anywhere, anytime! I’ve recently started to wonder if it’s the anxiety which constantly make me feel exhausted, as I’ve had the anxiety all my life so perhaps the two go hand in hand. Sometimes on stressful days when I’ve had to deal with a lot of anxiety trigger situations at work (I have social anxiety disorder) I can come home completely knackered & collapse on the couch, so even if we’re out there facing our fears & doing all the incremental exposures etc, I find it still impacts the subconscious & our core tiredness levels. Then you start wondering hmm… is my body really actually physically tired or is it all linked to my mental state caused by constant, incessant anxiety. It can be a real merry-go-round situation. I also like your term ‘amygdala yapping’… this is brilliant, & so accurate! I think Drew’s point around if we’re unsure (ie.pondering if we’re lying on the couch due to actual physical tiredness, or merely avoidance) to go over a short list of possible things to do, do one or two of these & see how they go, I think this will really help me. Anyhow going to get myself up and out now as I’ve given myself enough extra sleep this morn (it’s the weekend lol)… but I have things to do which are not going to do themselves😆
Yep, I have today off...instead of sleeping in ridiculously late or laying in bed with my amygdala yapping I just got up when I woke up. Making breakfast, fed the cats, wiped the counter...Guess what? Tired....upon waking...the usual...Pouted a little....I can do laundry, work out, set up Xmas tree....clean the porch off, or clean the mess I just discovered under the kitchen sink, I think I saw mouse poo(😳😬). We will see how long the bit of energy I have lasts.
Great discussion Drew. This was something I struggled with early on in my recovery years ago. Over time you learn that accomplishing things feels really good and you start to crave it. Once in a while you might actually find yourself interested in what you are doing instead of resting and ruminating, and that’s when the magic happens. That interest can build and propel you off the couch. I could always tell the difference between tired and anxious by gaging my rumination level. Laying around stuck in your head and scanning how you feel isn’t very restful. Doing some physical yard work that keeps you in the moment, even just in short bursts, is much more restful for the mind. Sorry for the ramble. Thanks for all you do!
Well articulated, you’ve hit the nail on the head with the rumination point and being a gauge, it’s so much more restful & quietening for the mind doing something physical or interesting… it’s just the effort it can sometimes take to actually start doing the thing, which can sometimes be the issue for me lol. A bit like going to gym… hard to push oneself out the door into the cold, but once I’m in the class or have completed my run (or whatever activity I did at the gym) boy do I feel glad I went and did it😁
So true that the initial effort is the challenge. You never regret after completing the activity, but the lead up can be quite excruciating. Sure wish the fight or flight system was easier to retrain through a couple of exposures, but it can sure be a long process. What’s on the other side is certainly worth the effort.
Boy I relate to this. In my case, it’s “Am I sick or afraid?” This week I actually called out from work— I haven’t done that in years— because of a bad cold. But then I spent some time thinking “But am I really sick enough to stay home? I think I’m just anxious. Oh no, is this avoidance?” (Despite having a cough, runny nose, and fever.) It was quite silly!
I do the same thing!