I'm going to cry next week when this is over!!!!!!
Beautifully said, as always. I didn't really believe that this would happen for me-until it did. While I still have a long road ahead of me to get back to driving on highways, I am able to get around my immediate area now. I feel the surge of panic, like you said, and then I am able to care less about it than I used to. I don't feel like it's as much of an emergency as I used to. I still cry in check-out lines, if I have to wait for a while and I get a panic surge, and I still cry at the deli counter for the same reason!!! However, I stay now and just let the tears come. I don't run out to the car and go right home. Even when people ask if I'm okay and I am supremely embarrassed, I stay and wipe my tears and finish the task! Now, if I cry in a store, I also make myself go somewhere else afterwards, just to be sure that I don't hightail it back to my house. I am so AMAZED that this works, that I can't even articulate what a relief it is! Thank you for the very important reminder!
Confused as to how it works eith health anxiety when the panic isn’t a short concentrated period of time like in a panic attack but goes on days and even months before you can discover you’re ok. How do you care more about your life whilst that background worry is constantly there and care less about the health anxiety. Wish I could crack this it’s ruining my Christmas whilst we are ill here.
The awareness of the fact that you have panicked is what makes one human. As a silent observer of that moment you make a conscious choice to move on and that is when recovery is activated. How far down the healing path you are is determined in just how quick and automatic that response is. Recovery is also about being fully awake in your life.
Thanks Drew, as Rebecca so wonderfully articulates below, this clarification helps a lot in understanding exactly what you mean by ‘care’ and ‘don’t care’ (he’s still a human after all, not a robot!😂). Context matters, as you indeed also frequently remind us. I think this also links brilliantly to a previous The Anxious Morning episode 130: ‘It’s Not the First Minute that Counts’ (I have shortcut links to quite a few episodes!!) which flips the narrative to make a similar point.. ie. those first few seconds or minutes of instinctive, knee-jerk reaction (which we may never end up eradicating) in that key moment of panic/freeze/wherever physical response one’s amygdala has triggered, aren’t the important bits. It’s the immediate action after this moment, where our acceptance and surrender kick in, and which leads to the ‘not caring so much anymore’ part. However… easier said than done lol, and I’m still working earnestly on it.. day by day, week by week!
Wowser, the final week of The Anxious Morning is almost upon us, argh😢 As Rachel said in her comments yesterday, I too am really going to miss this as it’s been fundamental to my ‘towards recovery’ journey this year, and most importantly it’s been absolutely fantastic for reinforcing and reminding us of, with practical golden nugget perspectives, all the great techniques from your books; it’s far easier learning small lessons in slow time, daily, than digesting big chunks which can be more easily forgotten. Thank you again for all the hope, inspiration, insight, laughs, tears and treasured memories you’ve given us this year, it’s been hugely impactful to so many of us and greatly appreciated🙏🏼💚
I love your explanation of how you respond to the first fear (or flash of anxiety/panic). That makes so much sense. That is where your level of care diminishes. Because you know what is happening and respond through not resisting, fighting, etc. Surrendering in the moment and allowing it. I really get what you mean now. Your words from your book are repeated so much in my mind, almost like some kind of mantra or affirmation...'it's never about how you feel. Never. It's about how you react to how you feel'. Thank you, because those words that are on repeat really do support me.
I think (and forgive me, I have not had time to watch the video you link and you may have covered it there) that maybe some people (maybe me?) actually thought you meant you didn't care about panic attacks as a whole in your life. Like the whole unpleasant and often distressing experience. So way beyond the second fear and all the totally upsetting symptoms. And I think I have thought...wow, how do you get to not care about that?! Thats like not caring about being thrown off a damn cliff! But course, you didn't mean that at all. You care and then through your surredenring reaction, your care goes right down to your toes and basically evaporates.
Great insight.
Merry Christmas Drew & family from Australia
🦘 ☀️ 🏖
I'm going to cry next week when this is over!!!!!!
Beautifully said, as always. I didn't really believe that this would happen for me-until it did. While I still have a long road ahead of me to get back to driving on highways, I am able to get around my immediate area now. I feel the surge of panic, like you said, and then I am able to care less about it than I used to. I don't feel like it's as much of an emergency as I used to. I still cry in check-out lines, if I have to wait for a while and I get a panic surge, and I still cry at the deli counter for the same reason!!! However, I stay now and just let the tears come. I don't run out to the car and go right home. Even when people ask if I'm okay and I am supremely embarrassed, I stay and wipe my tears and finish the task! Now, if I cry in a store, I also make myself go somewhere else afterwards, just to be sure that I don't hightail it back to my house. I am so AMAZED that this works, that I can't even articulate what a relief it is! Thank you for the very important reminder!
I love listening to this series, I sure hope you continue it! Have never missed an episode
I love this and I’m so glad I’m at this place!! Also, I still cherish Claire Weekes. ♥️♥️
Love this one Drew! You explain things so well, thank you for this. ❤️
I’ll miss this email in 2023.
Confused as to how it works eith health anxiety when the panic isn’t a short concentrated period of time like in a panic attack but goes on days and even months before you can discover you’re ok. How do you care more about your life whilst that background worry is constantly there and care less about the health anxiety. Wish I could crack this it’s ruining my Christmas whilst we are ill here.
The awareness of the fact that you have panicked is what makes one human. As a silent observer of that moment you make a conscious choice to move on and that is when recovery is activated. How far down the healing path you are is determined in just how quick and automatic that response is. Recovery is also about being fully awake in your life.
Thanks Drew, as Rebecca so wonderfully articulates below, this clarification helps a lot in understanding exactly what you mean by ‘care’ and ‘don’t care’ (he’s still a human after all, not a robot!😂). Context matters, as you indeed also frequently remind us. I think this also links brilliantly to a previous The Anxious Morning episode 130: ‘It’s Not the First Minute that Counts’ (I have shortcut links to quite a few episodes!!) which flips the narrative to make a similar point.. ie. those first few seconds or minutes of instinctive, knee-jerk reaction (which we may never end up eradicating) in that key moment of panic/freeze/wherever physical response one’s amygdala has triggered, aren’t the important bits. It’s the immediate action after this moment, where our acceptance and surrender kick in, and which leads to the ‘not caring so much anymore’ part. However… easier said than done lol, and I’m still working earnestly on it.. day by day, week by week!
Wowser, the final week of The Anxious Morning is almost upon us, argh😢 As Rachel said in her comments yesterday, I too am really going to miss this as it’s been fundamental to my ‘towards recovery’ journey this year, and most importantly it’s been absolutely fantastic for reinforcing and reminding us of, with practical golden nugget perspectives, all the great techniques from your books; it’s far easier learning small lessons in slow time, daily, than digesting big chunks which can be more easily forgotten. Thank you again for all the hope, inspiration, insight, laughs, tears and treasured memories you’ve given us this year, it’s been hugely impactful to so many of us and greatly appreciated🙏🏼💚
I love your explanation of how you respond to the first fear (or flash of anxiety/panic). That makes so much sense. That is where your level of care diminishes. Because you know what is happening and respond through not resisting, fighting, etc. Surrendering in the moment and allowing it. I really get what you mean now. Your words from your book are repeated so much in my mind, almost like some kind of mantra or affirmation...'it's never about how you feel. Never. It's about how you react to how you feel'. Thank you, because those words that are on repeat really do support me.
I think (and forgive me, I have not had time to watch the video you link and you may have covered it there) that maybe some people (maybe me?) actually thought you meant you didn't care about panic attacks as a whole in your life. Like the whole unpleasant and often distressing experience. So way beyond the second fear and all the totally upsetting symptoms. And I think I have thought...wow, how do you get to not care about that?! Thats like not caring about being thrown off a damn cliff! But course, you didn't mean that at all. You care and then through your surredenring reaction, your care goes right down to your toes and basically evaporates.
This makes sooo much sense.
It is always about how you react.
Thank you. A lot.