You can’t recover until you show up for your recovery.
That means that you are not going to get back living a normal life until you get out of bed, put on some clothing, and perform the basic tasks associated with getting ready for a day. Even when we don’t want to do this, we do this. It’s small, but it counts, and more than you think it does. That’s what showing up looks like.
You may be reading this at a point where you feel paralyzed by anxiety and fear and where you see yourself as simply unable to live the life you once lived or so desperately hope to live again. You may long for days occupied with work, hobbies, social interaction, travel, art, or whatever else you think makes life worth living. But at the same time, you may see those activities as so far out of your reach that they become impossible pipe dreams.
They are not. I promise. But you won’t get there in big leaps forward. So while that vacation to Europe may feel completely impossible for you, let’s just start the journey by showing up. Standing up. Getting ready to do something. Shedding the old posture and adopting a new one. We can’t get our lives back if we don’t at least show up ready for the process.
This might seem like silly life-coachy nonsense. And yeah, it does kinda look that way. But beyond the motivational message and the cliche, there is truth. And that truth is that there is always a first step to take. That first step is just the simple act of showing up.
So let’s get practical now. Here are a few questions you can ask yourself that can help you start to simply show up for your recovery. Forget the recovery itself. Just think about getting up on your feet and getting ready to get in the game. That’s a perfectly acceptable start.
What position are you in now? How are you behaving toward your anxiety, talking about your anxiety, and interacting with it?
How can you change that position or even just begin to question it so that you can start to turn in the direction of recovery?
What rituals are you engaged in now every day? What are you doing to “manage” your anxiety, avoid your triggers, or keep things from escalating into the “can’t handle it” zone?
How can you break one or two of those rituals so you can start to show up for for your recovery? Pick tiny things. They count. What crutch might you drop even for just a few minutes today that will face you toward your anxiety - and therefore toward recovery? You may not take actual steps forward today, but you can show up by at least facing in the right direction.
The idea of “showing up” is a bit amorphous. This is true. But if you chew on it a little, you may find it to be a powerful idea. How is it powerful? Because to use an awful sports analogy, you cannot win the game if you are not even present at the stadium.
So … go show up. That’s a start.
Hey it’s Monday and that means that today at 2 PM Eastern I’ll do my “Recovery Monday” livestream on YouTube, Facebook, and Twitter. Come join in!
61. Start By Showing Up